Hollow's Refuge
by Percephone
Summary: James & Lily, Year 7. Lily and James confront one of their greatest fears together and are recruited by Dumbledore to be a part of some Order...meanwhile, Sirius ponders the changing tides...
1. Chapter 1

Summary: James & Lily, Year 7. Lily and James confront one of their greatest fears together and are recruited by Dumbledore to be a part of some Order...meanwhile, Sirius ponders the changing tides that seems to have settled over the school. Remus desperately wants to keep his friends away from harm and Peter is still innocent - until...

A/N - This is Hollow's Refuge, the story I started a long time ago. I finally decided to post some of it. The rest is in my computer, waiting for editting.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Harry Potter. This is FAN fiction, no?

Please Review

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Chapter 1

James finally managed to squeeze the last of his school robes in his trunk which now stood upright beside his bedroom door. He sat on the edge of his bed, head lowered, forehead in palms, resting his elbows on his knees. He was staring intently at the ground, devoting all his concentration on purging his head of those awful thoughts...A loud rapping on the door jolted him from his uneasy trance.

"Er - yeah," he fumbled, "it's open."

Dark eyes, framed with black hair and eyebrows, entered the room. Sirius took special care not to make any noise, slowly letting the door shut, the soft click the only sound heard. He looked troubled, as though he'd just been scolded. He made his way towards James, speaking in a hushed voice. "Are you ready? Packed?" James nodded solemnly. His friend lowered himself down unto the bed, he, too, resting his elbows on his knees, staring ahead at the enchanted picture of a man's head floating towards a snitch (who was James's grandfather playing Quidditch with his invisibility cloak). Sirius' black hair drooped across his face, hindering James' view of his friend. He let his worry wrinkle his brow if only for a short second.

Both boys knew what was on the other's mind. Both knew the other's reaction to what that was. Both failed miserably in their attempts to mask their concern.

"Moony's going to meet us at the Leaky tonight. Wormtail'll show up tomorrow..." James drifted. He knew Sirius knew all this but he didn't know what else to say. They were best friends, hardly had to speak to communicate...they had faced countless dangerous situations, sneaked behind their Headmaster's back to make secret potions, had strutted a forbidden forest with a werewolf. This, however, was something none of the two 17 year olds were ready to face. The danger in walking in the moonlight with a full fledged werewolf seemed a walk on the beach compared to it.

"James, Sirius, we're leaving." James' mother called from behind the door. Her voice was softer than usual, more caring than her usual strict tone she took on to discipline her out of control son and his best friend, who she considered as a son anyway. Both knew she did this in order to cover her pain.

Sirius cast a quick glance at James, who was still holding his head between his hands. "Come on," Sirius grabbed his friend's trunk on the way out, leaving James to grab his cloak and glasses.

"You're not serious?" Remus' face went beyond pale as he watched his two best (usually rambunctious) friends stare blankly ahead, devoid of all emotion. Remus knew that underneath their blank expression, both boys felt the same as he did: unbelieving.

It was James who broke the silence, first by setting his mug on the wooden table, then clearing his throat, and finally sounding almost as confident as he usually was. "Listen, don't you dare think anything will change! We'll still take our usual trips, do what we - "

"Of course!" Sirius cut him off with a wide grin, slapping James heartily on the shoulder. "Nothing'll change!"

"But if you ever feel - " Remus trailed off, satisfied by the look of appreciation on James' face, one that would have gone undetected by any other than the one he aimed it at.

The evening wore on, each boy regaining his usual coolness, slyness, or just plain weirdness. Things were finally beginning to feel like they had last time they'd all been together. Before they fell asleep, however, each boy knew this year would be different from the rest.

"James Potter!" A stern voice bellowed from across the corridor. "Follow me." Professor McGonagall hardly had to pick up her pace to overtake the young Head Boy. He turned sheepishly to his three friends and mouthed 'I'll meet you in the common room'.

The transfigurations teacher brought the young wizard to a small room he'd never noticed before. (He made a mental note of it.) "Potter," she said as she opened the door. James stepped lightly inside, half expecting to be greeted by brooms.

To his surprise, an old silver haired, blue eyed wizard dressed in purple robes greeted him from across the room. He sat at a large mahogany desk littered with large dusty books. The Headmaster raised his head to look through his half-moon spectacles. "James Potter," he started, his voice heavy with wisdom. "Please, sit." A chair appeared from behind James, sweeping him off his feet, bringing him directly in front of the other wizard. "Lemon drops?" Albus Dumbledore never seemed to amaze anyone with how easily he could switch from mood to mood. James refused politely and stared at his headmaster. "James, it has come to my knowledge that you have learned some information this summer that may very well be...troubling, to say the least." James' eyes affirmed all of Dumbledore's suspicions. "I also noticed you've accepted the position of Head Boy. If at any time you feel your duties are too heavy, you may give back your badge."

"I can handle a bit of extra work, Professor. After all the trouble I have caused since I've come here, I don't see why spending a few hours here and there making sure others don't follow in my footsteps wouldn't smooth things over with the entire staff." He pushed his round glasses back up his nose, grinning suspiciously.

Dumbledore smiled and tilted his head so that now, he was looking over his own glasses. "Is there nothing else on your mind you wish to discuss tonight, James?" James squinted his face in mock concentration and after a few minutes of this, shrugged his shoulders and shook his head 'no'. "Very well then. Off you go." His bright blue eyes darted back to the book that lay sprawled on the desktop. "Oh and, just as well James, take extra precaution. These are dark times and I know you and your friends have a certain thirst for bending the rules and I will not appreciate you falling victim to your own, shall we say, troublesome nature." James smiled slightly in thanks and ducked out.

_How much does he know?_ James pondered while heading back to the Gryffindor common room. _Surely not about our transformatio_n...Deeply focused on trying to find an answer as to how Dumbledore could have found out, James hardly noticed that he had walked straight into something that felt rather like a someone.

"POTTER! WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, WILL 'YA?" He briefly turned and looked straight into the green menace of Lily Evans' eyes, continuing on his way. _Oh Lily_, he thought, _if only you could finally_ -

-

He hadn't stopped walking. This caused Lily Evans' cheeks to match her deep red hair. Never before had James casually walked away from her without smiling cockily, shouting a rude remark, or better yet, a self-loving remark. And the next thing shocked her even more: Sirius, James' Siamese twin (everyone could have SWORN they were connected at the hip) had been nowhere in sight. It's not like she cared why his usual self-righteous, self-loving attitude had instantaneously turned into a stiff git...all the better, perhaps he finally had some sense knocked into him. Lily made a mental note to track down whoever did and give them what they deserved.

James stopped dead in his tracks having walked only about seventeen paces away from Lily and spun on his heals heading straight towards her. "Come back to insult me, Potter?" she said, well at least that's what she had planned to say, but he had gripped onto her wrist and led her (against her will) to a corridor far away from prying eyes and ears. When he let go, he had her lean up against the wall (although, to her surprise, he hadn't reached over with his arms as he usually did to try to make himself seem charming). She looked up at him defiantly, glaring into his hazel eyes. "What do you want?" She sighed, knowing the answer.

"Well, you know I'm Head Boy, right?" She swallowed hard. She had hoped it were only a rumour aimed to upset her. Although, it would have explained why no one had shown up to accompany her on the train to attend to Heads duties. She shook her head. "Well, I am, which means I have...hmm, I believe I've got as much authority as you do, so please, if you would be so kind to perhaps stay off my back this year. I'll keep the Marauders under control so long as you stay far away from me - err - us."

Lily, ever since being made a prefect, had had her eyes set on catching James and his three accomplices in action, yet she had failed to do so for two years. They were sneaky, sly, and impossible to predict.

"Aww, Potter, are you finally over your crush?" She didn't let go of eye contact, nor did she want to. She'd look much more threatening by glaring into his eyes than staring at the ground. She put on a mocking sad frown and pretended to cry. "What am I ever to do? James Potter doesn't love me anymore! Wainnh! – "

"Cut it out Lily, I'm not joking. And I'm not...was never in love with you. I was only ahhh, never mind. Just please, is it a deal? Stay away from m… stay away from my friends and me and we won't go looking for trouble. If we're ever in trouble, I solemnly swear that it was after us."

Lily considered his words. They seemed sincere enough, but "How am I to know that you're really not going to get up to any nasty business? Honestly James, we've been going here for what, 7 years, and never once have I heard of such a thing as you making an honest deal with anyone."

He closed his eyes, almost as though explaining anything was too painful for him. "All I can say is that I've errm, grown up (a bit) and I well, you can hold me to my word this time. I lie to teachers to get out of trouble, I lie to some girls to get out of dates but never will I lie to you Evans."

"Curious. Go on," was all she said, a trace of flattery and threat surfacing in her eyes.

"Because in a matter of life or death, Lily Evans, I would like you to live, and if lying to you could get you killed, then I'm sorry but I'm not going to chance it." She opened her mouth to retort an insult but he cut her off by grabbing her hand in handshake, giving it a tug and saying "Done deal." He turned 'round the corner heading back towards the Gryffindor common room. She peeked around the corner, standing fuming yet relieved. This whole deal meant more to her than her knew. If he could keep his mates in check, then her year as Head Girl would be a breeze. He had to keep his word...just had to.

"AND DON'T WORRY EVANS!" He called from the other end of the hall, "I AM A MAN OF MY WORD!" And with that he disappeared.

Well, she thought, at least the Marauders aren't going to be a reason to deduct points from Gryffindor this year. But her mind wandered on a bit of what he had said. "...in a matter of life or death, Lily Evans, I would like you to live..." It sounded serious and whatever it was, Lily couldn't wait to pry it from Peter Pettigrew's tongue. The tables had officially turned in Lily's favour. My, my did she feel rather...sneaky.

-

When James entered the common room, the three boys were there waiting for him at a table in the darkest corner. James hurriedly sat down, hair a mess, glasses crooked, worry creasing his brow.

"Wha' he say, mate?" Sirius asked.

"Dumbledore? Just wanted to know if I was up to the Head Boy business, what with...well you know." Remus and Sirius nodded, Peter followed their example, although he had not yet been told of the present situation.

Sitting around the table planning the major 'outings' of the year, the Marauders lost track of time, and the only reason they slowly dragged their heels up the stairs to their dormitory was because Lily Evans had walked through the portrait hole and had scolded them for being out of their dorm. Of course, keeping up his half of the bargain, James led his mates up the stairs for the night.

Once the door was closed, it was Peter who spoke first, knowing he had been left out of something important and feeling a pang of jealousy that he had. "So, James, what's happening? Why –"

"Sorry Pete, but I don't think you really want me to tell you. I know how you get and Remus, Sirius and I figure it's best that we don't tell you." James slipped under his red covers – the same red as the curtains drawn over the window next to him.

"Aww, but, I promise I won't overreact! Please?" The blond haired boy almost tripped over his own feet.

Sirius cast Remus a look of annoyance, which was not reflected on his friend's face. "He'll annoy us until we tell him." He informed both the scrawny looking Remus and the very distant James. Remus simply shook his head, mumbling that Peter would find out in due time.

"Guys!" Peter interrupted loudly, though Remus and Sirius were still discussing the matter at hand.

"We should be careful about how we do it though," James said wearily, "because we don't want to scare him off, but then again, - "

"I can HEAR YOU, you know!" shouted the red-faced Peter.

"We can't let him think it's nothing," finished Sirius.

"We'll talk about it in potions, mates. Right now, though, we should all get some sleep." Remus pulled his blankets to his chin. Peter had finally given up and, it wasn't long before James heard soft snores coming from his corner of the room. James lay still, pretending to be sleeping while Remus and Sirius quietly argued about something related (James was sure) to rules as applied to exploding snaps. Soon enough, however, Sirius' breathing became deep, constant, and Remus' took on an odd rhythm – two short shallow breaths, one long deep breath, two short, one long – which meant that all in the room – save James – were asleep.

James lay awake, eyes closed yet unable to keep them so for more than a few minutes at a time. He couldn't get his mind off his father – a once tall, strong and intimidating wizard – who had come home with a deep sinking cheeks, dark eye circles, and hands shaking ferociously. His grey eyes had been frightened, instead of exuberating their usual pride and energy. James knew his father was a normal man, perhaps an exceptional wizard but still every bit as mortal as the next, and couldn't help but admire and idolize his father, which was the cause of his unease and alarm. He always figured his father was strong, but seeing him weakened, crying in front of James, his mother and Sirius, shaking hands, quivering body, convinced James that his father was not invincible, and the words he had later whispered to James were to be taken seriously.

Finally, slowly, sleep began to overtake him. He didn't struggle against it for he hadn't slept in many a days, but something inside him did not yet want to drift off. It was Lily. She hated him, of that he was sure, and he knew she was out to catch the Marauders in action, but it wasn't getting in trouble that worried James, it was the trouble Lily could cause onto herself. Death Eater activity had reached an ultimate high. They killed anything that was even remotely connected to Muggles, and…Everyone knew she was Muggle-born, everyone knew she was bright, quick, and had quite the temper, which made her all the better to prey upon if you were a follower of …

The birds of the Forbidden Forest began their soft chirping to welcome the rising sun. It was still dark outside, but the sky would soon take on a light blue glow, which meant the sun would soon be casting its rays onto the castle. James still kept his mind on Lily, however, determined to shake her off this term, to not even stir a slight argument so she would have no reason to stalk around the castle after them. James couldn't help but also feel responsible for the other Marauders. They were his best mates, and if anything should happen to any of them, James didn't think he could handle it. James sighed and rolled onto his side, eyes still closed, mind returning to Lily. He didn't love her, he never did love her, no matter what Sirius said, he was not infatuated by her. He was simply concerned, that was all, that she would be unable to handle the pressures that the world now faced and that evil people – people of the likes of Snivellus Snape – would harm her. Finally, James' muscles relaxed, hand hung from the side of his bed, and mind, with Lily's image still intact – floated off to a distant land.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Once again, Lily Evans, you have outdone the entire class!" Professor Slughorn almost pompously announced to the class. Evans smiled proudly; one could even say she beamed at the words of praise from the professor.

"You know, James, she calls you cocky, but she herself isn't all that level headed," Sirius whispered as he stirred the bright golden liquid of his cauldron. James smiled absentmindedly, focusing on some weird book he was "reading" upside down. In reality, there was a star map spread in the middle pages of the book, and James was figuring out when their next adventure would take place.

Remus knew what James was doing, and peeked over his shoulder. "Already? It seems like last month's was just a week ago," he whispered under a controlled tone.

James nodded. Seventh year was a lot more than he'd bargained for. Teachers were twice as demanding as they were in Sixth, the homework had shot up tenfold, the spells they learned were five times more complicated than those learned last year (although the Marauders still managed to excel in every subject…well almost all of them did anyhow), which left the students barely any time to breathe, let alone go off adventuring under the full moon. "It's Thursday," he whispered quietly, "you two up for it still?" Peter had not succeeded in getting an E in potions and thus Sirius, James and Remus saw less and less of Peter. Lily coughed. James knew she had heard. He dropped his voice even more. "She's onto us, so we'll have to be extra careful." The other boys nodded. "I think we could get Wormtail to go ahead of us. Moony, I assume someone will be accompanying you?"

"As always."

James looked at his potions book, stirred three turns clockwise, added a dried leaf of parsley, and stirred twice more anticlockwise. A bright light emitted from his cauldron, followed by a soft smell of mint rain. Remus shook his head in disbelief. What was supposed to take hours to make, James had conjured in less than thirty four minutes. His friend's genius never ceased to amaze him. "Alright," James continued as he poured the liquid into a clear glass vial, "that leaves Padfoot and Prongs. Sirius, I think I remember Hagrid saying something about pumpkin patches. Maybe Padfoot would like to walk through them for a bit."

"Yeah, I'll bring him around eight thirty."

"Great. I'll take prongs out, around eight, to make sure he'll be okay for the night."

Remus looked worried. "So we're going to do this?"

Sirius' smile had never looked more suspicious. "Of course."

Thursday's supper was brief as the Marauders had some business to attend to before making their monthly visits to unchartered territories. This night, they had picked Hogsmead (although not the first time, it would be the first time this year) and, considering the War, they had to plan everything precisely. Of course, Lily Evans, sly and sneaky as she was, always managed to pop up near the foursome whenever they tried to discuss their plans. Luckily (or unluckily), James and Lily had been summoned by McGonagall for some Head Boy and Head Girl duties. James had run over the plans once again with Sirius and Peter, Remus was to be checked on at approximately seven forty five by Wormtail, Padfoot out of the pumpkin patch by eight forty-five and James as soon as he could slip away unnoticed. They would meet at the Shrieking Shack, though Sirius protested and finally, Padfoot and Prongs would meet by the trail to go to Hogsmead before the curve.

'I know what's going on tonight, Potter," she spoke softly, so as not to draw attention, yet James couldn't help but detect a tone of pride and menace in her voice.

"I stand by what I said at the beginning of term Evans. Don't break our little deal." They turned down a dimly lit hallway.

"I never agreed to anything. What? Don't give me that look!" James retreated his reproachful eyes. "You shook my hand, James, but I didn't agree."

James' stomach churned. Lily was walking on thin ice suspended over an active volcano. "Evans," he threatened.

"And don't think I don't see right through you, Potter, what with this new attitude of yours." She paused to tell a few first year Ravenclaws how to get back to their tower with a charming smile and soft, motherly voice. Just as soon as she'd changed tones, Lily turned back to James and resumed her cold lecture. "Others may believe it, but I don't. Not even in the slightest."

James stumbled on the first step of the staircase, but quickly regained his balance and continued up the stairs. "I'm not playing anything, Lily, you've got it all wrong."

"So you are telling me that you are this sweet, innocent young man who helps first years to their classes, scorns fourth years for picking on the younger ones, and who takes great care so as to not go near Severus Snape? Ha! That's a laugh, really."

James shrugged. "I said I changed."

"Oh yes, I'd forgotten. James Potter changed. But why? Why is he no longer the annoying little prat that he usually takes to being? Why is James Potter keeping his friends quiet this term? Why, by Merlin's beard, would James Potter stop acting pompous, cocky, self-righteous, and arrogant?" Lily's face had transformed to a dark shade of red, which to James was really funny, as her hair was almost the same colour. It made it look almost as if her hair was a continuation of her skin.

He flirted with the idea of replying something witty, something he would have said last year, even a few months ago, something along the lines of "Why, do you miss the old James?" But instead, he shrugged and, quite pale-faced, stood silently as the stairs shifted.

"Come on, Prongs," James jumped, "don't you want to tell Lily Evans what's up?"

"Where did you get –"

"Don't play innocent James, or should I say, Prongs. Why do they call you Prongs anyway? Could it be because –"

James heart was stuck in his throat. He was sure there was a vein in his forehead that was about to burst. He was furious, angry that Lily figured it out (or almost did) but also scared that she had. Dumbledore was much cleverer than she and that meant that…"Lily, you're dancing far too close to forbidden grounds. I'd suggest – "

"Oh don't be chivalrous, Potter, and pretend to save me from harm. I've known for a while about all of your little nicknames. Let me see, Padfoot, Wormtail…Moony…but wh - "

James grabbed her wrist, swung her towards him, the anger almost radiating from behind his glasses. "Stay away from us, Evans, and don't you dare speak those names to anyone again!"

His fury was reflected in her face. "You don't scare me, Potter. I am Head Girl, and you know darn well that I am one of the top witches of our class – "

"Ahem!" They turned and say – to their horror – Professor McGonagall glaring at them. "You two better solve this soon, I will not have child's play be the downfall of Gryffindor. Now, up you go, straight to my office." The Head Boy and Girl made their way silently to her office, but never spoke a word to each other for the duration of the small lecture.

Once back at the common room (it was almost nine!), James slipped out of view to retrieve his cloak. It had been almost impossible – Lily was now watching him more closely than ever – but something had distracted her, and he had used this opportunity to become invisible. Slipping out of the portrait hole (thankfully, some second year had come in just at the right moment), James looked at the empty parchment. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," he said as he tapped it with his wand. The relatively new yet freaky caretaker, Filch, was out of sight, somewhere along the Slytherin tower, Dumbledore pacing in his office (as he took to doing quite often lately), McGonagall still sitting in her study. Everything was going perfectly as planned (except for the minor delay). "Mischief managed."

He escaped the castle unnoticed, although he had walked through the Bloody Barron. It had been a gross, cold feeling, but it hadn't been the first time James had touched death. Making his way down the road leading to Hogsmead, James was sure he had heard something behind him, but, when he turned, all he could see was the castle towering in the night.

He arrived at the meeting spot, glad to see a familiar dog wagging its tail. James spoke quietly in a baby voice, "Good puppy! You waited for me!" The dog growled, and James got to the point.

The journey started out as well as any other. Padfoot and Prongs arrived at the shrieking shack just in time to save Wormtail from getting stepped on by a very distraught werewolf. Moony's transformation had apparently gone quite well, as only minimal screaming was heard.

They made their way into Hogsmead village, walking just outside of the town, near the forest rather than on the road. They didn't struggle much with Moony's beastly instincts as something about their presence soothed him and Remus found himself in much more control than he had been in during his first year. Wormtail, tiring before getting to Honeyduke's, had climbed onto Prongs' back and slept while the other three, although quite alert, strutted towards the candy shop.

Prongs shook, sending an awakening rat flying off his back. He stomped his foot firmly, meaning "Go do your job now," which was to snatch a few sweets before heading into the forest. Wormtail, rat that he was, always ran around a bit first to scare as many ladies as possible before getting down to business. But Padfoot enjoyed watching him, watching the younger witches scream with fright at the ugly little thing. Who could blame them? It's not like Wormtail was a very good looking human to begin with, right? So how could anyone expect him to make a good looking rat?

Wormtail finally emerged with a bag of liquorice - one of the only things he had been able to grab. Prongs, however, paid him no attention. Something did not feel right, something felt…not out of place, but as though it should not be there. The hair on Padfoot's back stood up on ends as he caught the scent in the air. Their worries were confirmed when Moony howled. Someone was there, watching them, stalking them.

The four of them made a quick run for it, leading the now-almost-out-of-control Moony back to the Shrieking Shack. Wormtail, once there, continued straight into the Whomping Willow and most likely back inside the castle. Prongs and Padfoot were somewhat thankful, it meant one less person to worry about. Both of them led Moony into the room he usually transformed in, locked the heavy door, and transformed back into their human forms.

"Did you see who it was?"

Sirius shook his head. "No, but he smelt something awful. And be sure – it was a he!" James nodded in agreement. "What are you planning?" Sirius could tell James had already thought of something.

"Plan C. You go back to the castle via Whomping Willow," he caught his breath, unable to control his racing heart, "and I'll go get my cloak and the map." James' heart now deafened him, so whatever Sirius replied was somewhat unheard. "Just go straight to the castle, to the Common Room and stay there until I get back. If it takes me more than half an hour…send Dumbledore."

Sirius made to argue, but James had already assumed the shape of Prongs and had ran outside. _At least_, he thought as he ran as fast as he could for the place where Padfoot and him had met barely an hour ago, _Death Eaters don't aimlessly kill stags._

From there on, however, nothing went as he had planned.

Prongs arrived at the meeting place to find a peculiar smell in the air. He leapt into the brush transformed back into James, and snuck around on his hands and knees in search for his map, cloak, and, of course, ah, there they were – his glasses.

"Mister Potter…Junior, I presume." A deep voice hidden under a black cloak and hood snivelled as James managed to touch both cloak and map. He kept them hidden, moving ever so slightly, so as not to raise an alarm. "Glad to finally get rid of you then."

"_Morsmordre_." Someone shot up the dark mark into the sky. "It seems to me that you've neglected the rules, Potter. You, of all people, should know better to wander about the school grounds alone."

The other snickered. "Very daring, or just outright stupid. Tsk, tsk. What would your mother say?"

"You're marked, Potter. Last words?"

James struggled against his brains. _Come on! THINK! _He thought. _You're a smart boy, you're a wizard! Think!_ And then it came to him. He thought of it hard, focusing on it, then, aiming with his wand, shot invisible ropes at his attackers. One of them ducked, the other was knocked off his feet, head banging against the trunk of a tree.

"Naughty, naughty, Potter, you don't play nice at all, do you?" The man raised his wand. James barely had enough time to jump to his feet and dive over a few roots, protecting himself behind a tree. "Come out, boy, don't be a coward. At least your father fights us like a man. You wouldn't want to disappoint him would you?" As he said this, he aimed a wand at his accomplice and freed his comrade of the invisible ropes. Unfortunately for him, though, the wizard was still unconscious.

_Petrificus Totalus!_ James thought, pointing it at his opponent's chest, but the wizard was quick and managed to block off the attack, coming back with another unspoken hex within seconds. James was not directly hit, though he suffered a wound to his left arm as a piece of tree bark sliced through shoulder. He bit his lip, trying to calm his need to scream. He needed to buy time, needed to get his cloak on without the wizard noticing. "What do you want from us?" He said angrily. "Why bother us?"

"Potters. Blood-traitors all get what they deserve," the man said, and James was sure there was a smirk on his face, though he could not see it.

"On whose orders?" he slowly crouched down into a ball as the other wizard laughed insanely. He slowly swung the cloak behind him, readying himself to put it on.

"My Dark Lord, Potter, who else? He does not express any grief in doing so, either, as ridding the world of those such as yourself is actually one of his primitive goals."

"EXPELLIARMUS!" James roared and hit his target, ducked under his cloak, and repeated the attack, this time, on the unconscious wizard.

"STUPEFY!" another voice roared from behind a tree. James knew instinctively that this should not be happening. It could not be happening.

As it was, it was indeed happening, and the spell had completely missed the now very angry wizard and he was already trying to summon his wand, which was stuck under James' foot.

James knew it was Lily, but why, _WHY DIDN'T YOU LISTEN TO ME? _He wanted to scream at her, to stupefy her! But he couldn't. He just wanted to get to her, throw the cloak around her and tell her to remain quiet while he handled the Death Eaters. Courageous thoughts…he had no choice but to think them. Lily losing her life because all of this time James had made her life hell and she was too stubborn to refuse to listen to good advice was not something James wanted floating above his head. He decided to rush over to her, even if it meant his opponent would regain position of his wand.

"Lily!" he whispered as he caught a glimpse of her hiding beneath a willow tree. "Stay there!" he whispered-yelled again. Lily didn't move. He could tell she was scared, her hands were trembling, but her eyes showed resolution, power, and left little room for fear. He wrapped his cloak around her too, and then immediately brought her (as quietly as possible) over to the protection of another tree. "Lily, I told you –"

"James!" She said as she spotted him for the first time. She kept her voice low, but he knew the others could easily hear them and thus, hit them with a spell. "James, I ... I didn't know! The – there are Death Eaters after you!"

James sighed. People always had a habit of saying the obvious in times of distress. "I know Lily. Lily, you've got to take this cloak and head back to the castle, go get Dumbledore, and head straight to the Common – "

"No, James, I can't." She looked sorry, but determined. "I can't leave you here alone. This is a grown wizard James, he could kill you in no time!"

"Lily Evans," he spat, "listen to me! I demand that – "

"Come out, come out wherever you are! I won't bite…I might inflict unbearable pain, but I promise, it'll only last a short while. You will die soon enough."

James shuddered. He was beyond enraged. Lily was here, and he'd told her, told everyone around him, to let him face this alone! His arms began to tremble. "Look, James, you're afraid too, you're shaking –"

"I am shaking because of how angry I am right now, Evans." Lily shrunk back. Slightly.

"Well, I'm not leaving, so you might as well let me help."

"CRUCIO" the wizard screamed. The spell barely missed them, skimming the surface of James' cloak. He swallowed back his anger, and instead shot Lily a look of … a bit of anger, concern, horror.

"Fine, on three, I start a diversion and you…you …" his voice trailed off. The wizard was mere feet away from them. _INCENDIO! _James thought, concentrating all his anger on the success of the spell. And it worked. The Death Eater's robe caught fire – not a small fire, mind you, but was set ablaze. Lily took the opportunity to disarm him, and James found the strength to bind the imaginary ropes around him, this time, succeeding.

"CRUCIO!" The spell hit James squarely in the chest, sending white hot pain blaring through his entire being. His heart, he was sure, was due to stop any moment soon. His bones ached, his mind screamed with horror. Someone was saying something, throwing something at someone, and finally, after what felt like an eternity, the spell wore off.

James sunk to the ground. "Get up, James!" Lily cried, unable to contain her fear any longer. The usage of an unforgivable curse had made this duel all the more real to her. She was no longer showing James that she was just as strong as he was, she was now struggling to keep them both alive. "James, please, get up, we have to go!" James looked at her, glasses askew, eyes blurred with pain. "Get up Potter." And with a great amount of effort, she seized his arm, lifted him all the while ensuring the cloak was safely around them, and made her way quickly towards the castle. James' legs, however, seemed not to function well, and every so often, he would trip over a small pebble, or one of his legs would jus give way.

"The Whomping Willow," he whispered. Lily turned, saw the willow was actually peaceful tonight, and threw both herself and James on the ground in front of it. "The knot," he said. She slowly stood and pushed it, shaking hands and all. She could hear the two other wizards making their way towards them. The trunk opened very much like a door. James rolled himself in, grabbing Lily in the process. The willow shut itself.

"Wh – how did you…?" her voice trailed off. She had been hit with something, for she had a cut across her forehead, and her hand was also covered with blood.

"Lumos," he whispered, and a soft glow lit both faces.

"You're hurt," he said, pointing out the obvious, angry with himself for letting her get hurt.

"It's a scratch. This blood is yours." James understood. There had been an odd taste in his mouth and now he knew it had been the taste of blood. "James, are, are you okay? What do they want with you?" a hint of tears lined her voice, but her eyes did not betray her pride.

"I'm fine. Shh…" he shut his eyes, laying on the cold hard ground within the Whomping Willow, relishing in the protection she offered, knowing full well what awaited them at the other end of the tunnel. It made no difference though. James would chance this danger. Surviving a werewolf attack seemed much more probable than surviving another unforgivable curse.

Lily seemed unable to relax. "James, they're going to stand out there until we die of starvation!" she spoke softly now, scared, but sensing James' breathing slow down, she tried to regain her composure.

"Sirius will send Dumbledore soon. Don't worry, Evans. We know how to plan stuff." Lily smiled if ever so slightly, daring to believe James, who had now regained his usual smug face.

It vanished immediately. He blanched, face becoming as pale as snow. "James?" he could only stare at the top of the tunnel, eyes locked in horror. "Potter, stop, you're scaring me."

"Dumbledore…he'll find out about…"

He quieted as he heard screaming, cursing, a loud THUD! and footsteps outside the willow. "Nox. Shh, don't make a sound!" James took Lily in with one arm so that they would take the least amount of space possible, and pulled the cloak in tight around them.

Dumbledore walked through the trap door, light coming from his wand. For a moment, his eyes seemed to linger on James, looking at him over the top of his half-moon spectacles, he seemed to see through his cloak, but James shrugged it off. No, it was impossible, not even Dumbledore could see through invisibility cloaks…could he?

His racing heart finally slowed when Dumbledore reluctantly pulled his head out of the opening of the tree. "There's no one there," he said, "I assume that everyone is presently safely sleeping in their own dormitories." He said it as though it were a command.

Everything went dark as he shut the trap door. After a while, positive that everyone had left, James reached into his back pocket. The map was still there. "Lily?"

"Hmm?" she almost sounded asleep, but her uneven breathing told him she was still shaken by the night's events.

"What happens now you will never, ever repeat to anyone, promise?"

She opened her mouth to object, but instead, noting the seriousness of his voice, she simply said, "Yes".

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," he tapped the wand at the map, then lit the end of his wand.

"Where did you get that?" Lily's green eyes sparkled with interest and awe as she saw what the map revealed.

"Our little invention." He smiled. Lily couldn't believe the sheer genius of the enchantment.

"You and – "

"Sirius, Remus. Pete too. Come, no time to chit chat, coast is clear. Let's get this night over with." He struggled to stand, refused Lily's help, who in turn refuse his hand, and together they walked out of the Whomping Willow. None said a word to the other the entire time it took for them to reach the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Er – Lily," he kept his voice low, almost putting a sweet tone to it.

"James?" She replied in the same voice.

"I – er – thanks, for what you did. I wouldn't be alive if you wouldn't have been there."

Lily smiled briefly, then the edge of her lips turned into a devious smile. "From now on, Potter, you better let me in on things. No more trying to protect me while keeping me blatantly ignorant. Alright?"

"I owe my life to you. I cannot refuse you." Was all he said. Lily tipped her head to one side, as though pondering the meaning of his words. Then, suddenly, she straightened her spine, flung her hair to her back with a flick of her head, and walked out from underneath the cloak into the Common Room.

"Remember what you said, Potter. After all, it was you who said you are a man of your words." And with a mischievous smile, she vanished into her dormitory.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Back in his dormitory, James received anything but peace and quiet. Sirius immediately jumped out of his bed and helped James heal his minor cuts and bruises. Peter jumped anxiously on his bed, waiting until James finally was able to recount his exceptional defeat of the Death Eaters. James merely looked at him in despair. It had been all but an exceptional defeat.

Recounting his run in with the two evil wizards, and then his (pleasant yet also irritating) surprise, James left nothing out, except for what had happened outside the Common Room. The words hadn't meant much, but the facial expressions…they had meant everything, and the exchange of looks was something James considered to be very personal between him and Lily.

Lily, on the other hand, could barely sleep. She had bathed, washed her cut clean, and lay on her four poster bed, looking at nothing in particular, yet seeing the night's events playing over and over in her head.

She had seen James walk out of the castle and had followed him from the Common Room. She had seen him greet a dog and then she saw…she saw a stag. James was an animagus. That only meant that the other four were too. But how? Certainly this had been accomplished illegally. Lily made a sound that resembled a grunt. So James Potter and Company **were** a lot smarter than she had given any of them credit for. She wanted to ask him so many questions – since when, for one, and why a stag? She had then climbed to the top of a tree, careful not to rip her robes, and she had only to wait about an hour when the same (rather magnificent) stag reappeared, this time alone, and looking much more distressed. The stag had dove into a brush, and James had been crawling on the ground, looking for something. His glasses. Lily shrugged. She had been about to scream at him that he had finally been caught, but ruffling of the leaves had changed her mind, and she saw, to her great horror, that two hooded wizards – wand at the ready – were making their way towards the defenceless Head Boy. She had wanted to do something, perhaps hex them, stupefy them, anything, but she had been so shocked, so nervous, that all her limbs had frozen still. It had taken a long while to climb down the tree, sneak into the comfort of a larger tree, and only when James had shown courage not even Godric Gryffindor himself could rival, she decided to make her move.

He had been angry with her. Of course he had! He had specifically warned her to stay away from the Marauders – or was it him? – this term. He knew they were after him, he had to have known. Something clicked in Lily head. _Ah, so that's why he's been acting more mature. The prospect of dying has made him realise…_ she cut herself short. That had been an evil thought, something not even a Slytherin would think up. James had been brave enough to face two Death Eaters, knowing he didn't stand a chance against one of them. He had known he was to die; he just wanted to put up a fight. The green-eyed girl shuddered. How does one face imminent death? Lily found herself admiring James, hoping that if she were ever to be faced with this dilemma, she would handle herself much in the same way as James – courageously fighting until death. She closed her eyes and secretly wished that James would be left alone.

The next morning, the entire school was buzzing about there having been Death Eaters on school grounds. There had been a few deaths at Hogsmead and, naturally, people extrapolated that information to include Hogwarts. Professor McGonagall reassured the first years (and second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh years as well, though they tried to look unaffected) that the Death Eaters had not made it past the school gates, hadn't even considered it. James and Lily knew otherwise, however they kept this information to themselves.

Unexpectedly enough, Lily sat beside the Head Boy during breakfast, making no conversation. Sirius looked at them suspiciously, thinking that something other than fighting evil wizards had happened last night, but, seeing the confused look on James' face, his suspicions died down. So it was Lily that was playing at something.

"Pleased to see you this morning, Evans," Sirius said through a half-faked grin.

"Likewise," she said solemnly, and resumed her (if you could call it eating, as she was only nibbling bits and pieces off her muffin) breakfast. James had shot Sirius a glance that told him he would see him later. Sirius, uncomfortable with the idea of letting James out of his sight, grudgingly rose from his bench and headed out of the Great Hall.

"What is it, Evans?" He wasn't sure he had the right to inquire.

"We're back to addressing each other by last names, are we?" she raised an eyebrow, her green eyes bearing into his, searching for something.

"Sorry, Lily." She smiled casually. "How can I be of service to you today?"

But Lily shot him a glare. "Don't even think about it, Potter. You're not my servant. You don't owe me anything."

"Lily, that's…I don't know about Muggles, but wizards work this way." She looked at him a bit confused. "A life for a life. We are bonded. I owe you what is called a life debt. I am forever indebted to you."

"Well that doesn't mean you have to treat me like a queen. Nothing happened last night, James, there were no Death Eaters in the school grounds, there were no students running around outside, there – "

"Potter, Evans, the Headmaster wishes to speak with you." The colour drained from Lily's face as the words were uttered from the deputy Headmistress.

James and Lily followed McGonagall as best they could. She walked swiftly for an older woman, and James' legs were still weakened from the Cruciatus curse. He dared not complain, however, since, as Lily had pointed out, nothing had happened the night before.

"Vomit Beans" she said, and the door to the Headmaster's office opened, allowing the two students to step onto the spinning stairs, bringing them up to his actual study.

"Come in, come in," came the soothing voice from beyond the door when the stairs had barely just finished spinning. James opened the door and let Lily walk in first, although she would have preferred walking in behind James, so she could hide behind him. Not that she was a coward, she was just slightly afraid of Dumbledore's reaction.

"It has come to my attention to me that both of you were out of your dormitories last night around the time of the attacks. Am I right?" James nodded. His mind drifted to the present situation. The headmaster, tall and lean, had sat at his desk, sitting straight although leaning on the books sprawled out in front of him, looking through them over his spectacle. The fact that they had not been offered a seat was a bad sign. Lily nodded after James did. She would follow his lead…he hoped.

"And where, can I ask, were you, Mr Potter."

"I was outside, sir."

"And you, Miss Evans?"

"I was too, Headmaster."

Dumbledore smiled. "Right," he said. "And what, may I ask, were you to doing outside at this late hour? Especially you, Mr Potter, who knows your life is in very real danger at the present moment!"

James kept his nerves under control. _Lily,_ he thought, _just go along with this please!_ "Well, Headmaster, my fellow Head Girl and I had gotten in a bit of an argument, as Professor McGonagall may have informed you – "

"She has," he interrupted.

"and I wanted Evans to get it through her thick skull that – "

"Mr Potter, there is no need for name calling."

"Yes, Sir, er no Sir, sorry. I just, I get really into my arguments, I guess because I can also be quick tempered." Dumbledore smiled at the understatement. "In any case, the argument was actually never brought up, and we ended up talking about other things. I guess we thought we shouldn't be yelling at each other if we didn't want to get caught, and so we just walked and talked until…well, they came."

"And how did you manage to slip past Mr Filch and his cat? How did you manage to walk the halls of this I can say top-security castle, when ghosts are always floating about?" That's when James knew Dumbledore had seen them through the cloak.

"I have an invisibility cloak, sir." Dumbledore's eyes lit up momentarily. "It's somewhat of a family heirloom. It's been in the family for generations, though my Grandfather gave it to my father who gave it back to him since he did not like its colours – I know, it's an invisible cloak, but my father is peculiar in that way – and he gave it to me on September first, seven years ago."

"Such a precious gift to give such a young boy. One who, I no doubt can guess, your grandfather knew how mischievous he was."

"Yes, sir. But he knew the Headmaster at the time, and thought that it wouldn't bother him much, although, if you want to, Sir, I will send it home immediately."

"No, Mr Potter, I believe it is extremely handy that you were given this cloak. It has, after all, saved your life, has it not?" James merely nodded. He was baffled. "Right. Now, I know what happened last night. One of your friends may have let a few words slip – do not blame him this. I am the Headmaster, James, and thus have the right to demand the truth from my pupils, no?" James agreed. "You survived the Cruciatus Curse, if I am not mistaken."

"Yes sir." He almost had said "Sorry, sir" but thought better of it.

"That is a feat only few can claim to have survived without a slightest scar. You are, it seems, a far more gifted wizard than pranks and riddles then, James." James' cheeks regained some colour, although in abundance. "Miss Evans, you also had a hand in James' survival and for that, I cannot thank you enough. But now, let us get down to business. Please, sit." Once again, Dumbledore waved his hand and two chairs swept underneath his two pupils who automatically sat down, and pulled them up to his desk. Being offered a seat was always a good sign. James' years of getting in trouble provided this as fact.

"As you very well know, the world is at war. Lord Voldemort is gaining more power, more followers, and in so doing causing havoc and chaos across the world. What I am about to reveal to you now must be kept a secret, for it is a secret to all except those who are included. The knowledge of it will change both your lives. Do you wish for me to continue?" Lily nodded her head, whilst James said "please". "It is called The Order of the Phoenix, a non-ministry organization that has set out to stop Voldemort and his Death Eaters and protect those who are unable to do so."

"Like Aurors," chimed in James.

"Yes, like Aurors, except not affiliated with the Ministry of Magic. They are elite wizards and witches who excel in whatever is demanded of them – and that does not necessarily mean school subjects, but definitely implies that bravery, secrecy, and the determination to succeed is always present. Our cause is just, and must be appointed to those who value life, treasure relationships, and, of course, are willing to die for their cause. I extend an invitation to you, Lily Evans, and you, Mr Potter, to join me and The Order upon graduation from Hogwarts."

James mouth opened, but no words came out. This was an honour he never knew he could be offered.

"Perhaps it was luck that kept you both alive, last night, or perhaps it was skill and determination. But what I know is that together, you managed to help me imprison two Death Eaters and reveal some of Voldemort's more secret plans. For that, I owe you recompense, but I doubt that a candy will suffice. As you are also efficient, courageous, and loyal, this makes you, to me, most valuable to our cause. This is why I offer you the opportunity to continue to work against Voldemort and his army, and to devote yourself to restore peace and tranquility back to our world." A look of pain or uncertainty flickered across Dumbledore's eyes. James figured that the Headmaster must have had to fight against himself to offer this to two of his students.

"I would be honoured, Headmaster," Lily's voice was soft, resolute.

"And I would be too, Sir, however – "

"Your friends also have a certain, can we say, talent for danger. I will speak to them individually as the moment arises. For now, however, let us concentrate on you two. You will speak of the Order to no one – not even Mr Black, James – and you will spend two hours a week taking lessons from a certain member of the order, who will teach you spells, jinx, and hexes that you will most definitely never learn in your Defence Against the Dark Arts classes. I will send word when it is time. Until then, I do believe you both have class? Off you go, now."

James and Lily stood, sharing a secret look of bewilderment, excitement, and curiosity, and turned towards the door.

"Oh, and Mr Potter," James turned, "You would make any wizard or witch proud." James flushed, thanked the Headmaster, and headed for the door.

Lily followed on his heels.

The two Head Pupils did not get another chance to talk to each other until later that Friday, after Quidditch practice (where James faked a hit by a bludger to the arm, was rushed to the hospital wing and Madam Pince was finally able to heal the quite large cut on his shoulder, leaving only the tiniest scar.

"So what did he say then?" Sirius had asked, Peter hiding behind him. Remus, whose night had gone as bad as Lily's and James', was listening from his own hospital bed.

"I'm not in much trouble. Something about two hour detention." James hated to lie to Sirius, but he did not want to betray Dumbledore's trust. Being a part of the Order meant that James would be able to save his family from … he would keep them alive, and save more people and their families too. No one, not even Snivellus, deserved to die at the mercy of Voldemort…well, maybe Snivellus did….but _no! Wipe that out of your head!_

"And Evans?" asked Peter.

"Well, Wormtail, she got off too, same as me – detention, two hours a week."

Peter's face paled, "Sorry, I really didn't mean for you two to get in so much trouble."

James faked a stern look, which quickly dissipated as Lily walked into the room. "Potter," she said, "I have a question." James sighed, the other Marauders went over to Moony's bed. "How's tomorrow morning?" James shrugged.

"How's tomorrow morning for you?"

"Tomorrow morning is fine for me, Po – er – James. So I guess I'll see you in the kitchens at seven?"

"The kitchens at seven." James waited for her to turn around, but she showed no sign of wanting to leave. "Uh, Lily?"

"James?"

"Would you like to er – sit down?"

She shook her head as thought just realising she was still standing beside James' bed. "No, sorry, I'll see you tomorrow at seven. And, something about no robes. Something about a cloak…" that meant to wear Muggle clothes and bring the invisibility cloak. James smiled and nodded. With a slight smile, Lily turned on her heels and walked out the door.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

It had actually been a pleasant surprise to see Dumbledore was the one "tutoring" them. He explained by saying that most members of the order were either too busy with other assignments or that they did not agree with his asking two young students to join their ranks.

"But I am of age," asserted James. Lily nodded in agreement. She had just come of age not so long ago. Dumbledore continued that he trusted them and had faith that they were mature enough to handle what was to come.

Maturity, both Lily and James found, had nothing to do with surviving the training.

It was by far the most gruesome kind of practice James had ever received. Quidditch was physical, with a bit of strategy. Fighting evil was a mixture of brains with physical strains and listening to your gut instincts meanwhile considering the messages your brain was sending. It was memorizing a long list of spells, exactly what they did, and, very importantly, being able to do them at the whim of a thought. Oh yes, it is very important to concentrate on the spells you cast, but you must always be thinking ahead of your actions. You must be able to consider what is happening in front of you now, and make up at least five scenarios of what may happen next, all without a blink of the eye.

James had never felt so exhausted in his life – after the first half hour of training. Dumbledore seemed to enjoy watching James struggle (for the only other time James had experienced any kind of struggle was whenever he tried to get Lily's attention) and if Lily wouldn't have been so busy with her own training, she too would have taken the time to revel in James' efforts. Despite being out of breath, mentally fatigued, and complaints of wearied muscles, James and Lily had both done well in their training. They learned quickly, adapted very well to change, and trusted, not only their own instincts, but each other. They were a formidable pair, and Dumbledore immediately made up his mind to make them a team.

Walking towards the Prefect's bathroom, Lily asked James what had been on her mind ever since Friday morning. "What did Dumbledore mean by the whole 'every witch and wizard would be proud' thing?"

James smirked, rubbing his head with his hands nervously, making his hair look even more unruly than it normally was. "Well, we are in Gryffindor, are we not?" His smile gave it away – he was keeping something from her.

She let it drop though, and thought better of how to get him to choke up the entire truth.

James was in the shower, leaning onto the wall, letting the hot water soothe his aching muscles, sometimes the soap would burn his small cuts from Thursday night. He stayed there for a long while, almost drifting off to sleep.

"Hey, Potter, what's taking you so long?" James, jolted from his daydream, started. He couldn't see well, as his glasses were on the counter in front of the shower, but he could see who was standing on the other side of the shower.

"EVANS! What are you playing at?"

"Now, Potter, I have here in my hands a nice towel, some clothes, shoes and oh, yes, glasses. Now, unless you tell me what exactly is going on with you, you can kiss all these goodbye." Blackmail. She was blackmailing him!

"Alright alright, Just, I don't wanna scream it you know? So err – give me a moment to – "

"No, everything is secure. Tell me now, Potter, or else!"

James sighed. She would eventually pay, but he was in no position to bargain. "My father was attacked this summer by a group of Death Eaters." He heard a little gasp over the shower's noises. "They want us all dead, my entire lineage. He-wh…Voldemort you see, is quite keen, as the heir of Slytherin, to rid himself of those he deems as a disappointment to wizards. We're purebloods, the whole lot of us, although it hasn't been forced for over three centuries. We just happen to fall in love with each other, which is kind of gross…I mean, my mother is my father's third cousin's niece's aunt. Does that make sense?" Lily's eyes opened wide, though she kept her thoughts private…for now. "My parents were pushing towards overall equality between Muggle-borns and wizardkind. Exactly what Voldemort is against, which means that, well, let's just say that, I will definitely die in the coming years, unless someone can defeat Voldemort. …" his thoughts trailed off as he tried to envision himself, much the age he is now, duelling with the most evil wizard the world had ever seen. Lily just couldn't believe he had come to terms with this death sentence so easily.

"James?" James noticed she had thrown his towel over the edge of the shower, as well as a shirt and some underwear. He took the hint, dressed, and stepped out, still partially blind, jet black hair, even darker now that they were wet, managing to stick up in every which direction. Lily eyed him, though he couldn't tell, and reluctantly passed him his glasses. She had sort of enjoyed seeing him humbled by his inability to see perfectly. "I apologize for stealing your clothes," she grinned sheepishly, which he returned lopsidedly. "So does your cockiness come from your own perspective on your bloodline?"

"Cocky?" she glared at him. "Fine, I admit, I am a little…well, self-centered. However my lineage has nothing to do with it. I am a lone child, you see, well, not anymore, ever since Sirius showed up…" Lily had heard enough.

"You're a good guy, you know. I mean, I hate you and all, but you aren't so bad, once you let go of yourself a bit." She smiled weakly. "What I meant to say is, I hated you then because it was really pathetic how much you tried to get attention. But, that's all over with, right?" Her cheeks started to feel hot. She was babbling nonsense again.

"While we're confessing to one another, I was quite obsessed with you, as I'm sure you know." Lily rolled her eyes. "And I'm sorry for having been a downright git, but I mean, who could blame me, right?" She cast her eyes in every direction so as to avoid his, making her look suspicious. "Well face it, Evans, you are desirable. First off, you're a charming young lady when you want. You have this untameable personality which is actually quite attractive to one such as me. And then there's your sympathy and empathy…" it was his turn to flush. "I mean, not that I knew you all that well, but you were always the top witch of our class, always the first one to stick up for people – even if they didn't deserve it – and, well, you hated me and a challenge is always appealing." He suddenly felt extremely naked, despite his underwear, towel wrapped around his waist, and loose shirt. It was as though he had just described to her in minute detail how he looked like from the inside.

And that was exactly how she had interpreted it. She was embarrassed for him, but also for herself. Intimacy was the last thing she had expected to share with James Potter. "Umm, I should probably give you these now, seeing how uncomfortable you might be without your pants on." James took them graciously, but did not move. "Maybe it'd be better if we tried not to get on each other's nerves this year, I mean, seeing as we'll be spending at least two hours a week together – "

"Not to mention Head Girl and Boy duties. I see the logic of a treaty between us, now that you mention it."

"Great. Umm, James?"

"Lily?"

"I'm sorry that I didn't listen to you when you tried to warn me. I was so sure you were up to something, I…I didn't trust you."

"You had no reason to. But trust me now, alright?" She nodded, anxious to run out of the door and step into a zone that was a little bit more comfortable than talking to a half naked James Potter.

"I'd best be off now. See you around James."

"See you around, Lily." They stood a moment longer, just a moment, not looking directly at each other, but trying to steal glances of the other's eyes. Finally, Lily shifted her weight and smiled shyly at James – cheeks as flaming red as his – and bolted out the door. She had to find her friend, Grisella, and tell her about this. Pronto.

James emerged from the Prefect's Bathroom only a short minute later – deep set eyes sparkling from behind his wire-rimmed glasses – running his hand through his head. He had taken to ruffling his hair a few years back to give him a sexy sort of sporty edge (a favourite amongst the girls) but now, it had become a bad habit of his. He couldn't help but ruffle his hair at the slightest amount of stress or unease or sheer lack of ways to occupy his hands.

"PRONGS!" Sirius called him over to their table in the Great Hall, saving a seat for him. When James pulled his leg over the bench, before he had even a chance to sit, Sirius bombarded him with questions. "How was detention? What'd ya have to do? Was Evans with you? Did she cry?"

Remus glared at his long dark haired friend. "Give him time to breath, Padfoot, gee wiz." James noticed Remus was still sickly pale, and he hadn't yet completely healed his minor scratches, but apart from that, he still looked healthy.

Peter smiled at James. "I heard you had to clean the dungeons," he said, "Lily told Grisella – "

James nodded. "Yup, they are filthy, and no, she didn't cry Sirius, and while you're beside them, hand me a pancake?" Sirius obliged. The Marauders then bent their heads in low and mumbled something about the next outing.

"No, James, you can't be serious!" Remus exclaimed. "You've already – "

"Come off it, Moony! I promise I'll be glued to Sirius' hip, I won't leave his sight."

"No. It's too risky. Dumbledore would have my head if anything happened again." Remus looked distraught. Well, he almost always did but obviously, the thought that Death Eaters had managed to attack one of his best friends during the full moon…well, he couldn't help but blame himself for it. If it were to happen again, he would die. His friends shouldn't have to risk their lives even more to keep him company.

"Remus, just let James decide what he wants to do. If he says it's okay, then it's okay." Sirius, always defending James, well, ever since James had taken to being more quiet. The conversation was abruptly cut as a first year ran up to James to ask him if he could show him where the bathrooms were. James, picking up an apple, stood and left the three Marauders alone, once more.

"Something's up," Sirius concluded out loud. "James isn't James anymore. Well he is, but much less extravagantly so. I say he got hit with a spell by the Death Eaters." He whispered the last part hardly loud enough for Peter to hear.

"He got hit with an unforgivable curse, Sirius." Remus scolded. All because of what James referred to as his "furry little problem". All of this for him.

"Right," said Peter, "and I'm sure Dumbledore gave him hell for it, knowing what he told him at the beginning of term." Sirius nodded at that point, but he knew it was more.

Times had changed. Sirius was the first to know. Ever since he'd moved out of his mother's, he had been around James almost twenty four hours a day, and could always tell what mood James was in even before he opened his mouth to speak. When Mr Potter began coming home later in the nights, James hadn't changed too much, the only thing was that he lost a slight amount of sleep, worrying about his father and mother. Then, news had surfaced about a mass killing – over thirteen wizards and witches from the same family had been murdered in their sleep. James had known the family – they had been pure blood and naturally were somewhat related to both him and Sirius – and that had jolted most of his arrogance out of him. He, Sirius figured, had thought that being a pure blood would keep him from harm's way. Having a pure blood family murdered like that had proved otherwise.

But that year, James had still put up a show. He had dated two girls throughout the school year (not seriously, but just as far as holding hands in Hogsmead, snogging under the mistletoe), had won Gryffindor the Quidditch cup (for the third year in a row), and had become relentless in his hexing of poor unassuming Slytherins. His obsession with Lily had been suppressed, although Sirius knew it was forced away. A few times he had caught James peering over her way, lost in a daydream Sirius knew he wasn't part of. But, thankfully, he hadn't turned into a useless prat, trying to always impress her. Instead, he had taken to his friends, impressed them constantly with his vigilant plans, and how he so often managed to escape detention. He had also grown taller that year.

And then came this summer. James had received an owl from his mother explaining that upon their arrival at King's Cross, Sirius and James were to head straight to James' grandfather's, where they had stayed for a full fortnight. Sirius hadn't complained – Mr Potter Senior was always entertaining, the very old ex-Quidditch seeker who was known to play with his invisibility cloak wrapped about him, making it seem as though only a head was floating around after the snitch. And then, Mr Potter, James' dad, had been attacked. James, protective as he was, had partially blamed himself and had apparated immediately to his father's side at St Mungo's. Sirius had given him room, but James had pushed and distanced himself even more. Sure, they still hung around together as much as before, but their laughter wouldn't last long, and their pranks weren't as funny. That's when Sirius realised that it was time for him to show himself as a true and loyal friend, one who sticks by James no matter what, because, like it or not, James was his brother, and, being slightly older, Sirius felt responsible for him. The last three weeks before heading back to Hogwarts, James and Sirius had had a long discussion, and it had been the first time Sirius had ever seen James that angry, that scared, and that sad. Padfoot had only then discovered the true nature of Prongs; a young protective man, determined, and always seeking peace.

Sirius had been forced to grow up that very moment Prongs had told him, tears welling up in his eyes, that he was scared he was going to die young. He confessed that he had always wanted to wed, have children and be as cool as his dad had been, but, he had said, "I know Voldemort won't rest until we're all dead. I'm going to die soon, Sirius, and everything I own, I give to you."

"No," Sirius had replied, "I'll do everything I can not to let you die, Prongs. Moony and Wormtail's the same. We're in this together, all four of us." Padfoot, in that instant, realised that by saying those words, he had gone from an immature 17 to a mature man. He felt more like a man than he had ever before.

Sirius was jolted from his thoughts as he spotted Lily Evans walk through the entrance. She was chatting with her friends, but she obviously looked tired, shaken. Her green eyes were still keen, however, and she headed straight for Sirius before he even had a chance to take out his wand.

"Don't you even think about it, Padfoot," she said. Sirius jumped as she called his name. "No use of magic outside of the class, Mr Filch has warned you time and time again."

"Evans, wait, come here a minute." Remus glared at his friend, Peter stared mouth agape. Lily reassured her friends and approached the boy whose eyes, to her opinion, showed traces of insanity. She eyed him suspiciously. "All I want to say is thank you." Her eyebrows scrunched confusedly. "I wasn't there, I should have been, but you were and you helped him out alive, so thanks. But next time, I'll be there, trust me. You won't need to…" Understanding flushed Lily's cheeks.

"Look, I know what's happening with James – he told me himself – but don't you think it's a bit risky to go out at night knowing perfectly well that James could very well die?" She took on Mrs Potter's tone whenever she lectured her two sons (one biological, one adopted).

Remus spoke up. "Don't you think we – don't you think _I_ know that?" Peter didn't say a word. Sirius' glare didn't relent.

"Honestly, couldn't you four transform within the school and stay inside?" Sirius, Remus, and Peter's heart leapt to their throats. They had been figured out. She noticed their discomfort. "Don't worry, I won't tell, only, Merlin forbid, I should. Just promise me you'll look out for James, keep him away from anywhere off grounds, and – "

"We don't need to promise you. We've already come to the same conclusion." Peter's voice, scarcely heard to Lily's ears, made her jump a step.

"Good. Now if you'll excuse me, I must go back to my friends." Padfoot nodded, as did Moony. Wormtail simply looked down at his hands nervously.

"How odd it is," mumbled Moony once she had left, "that whilst James is looking out to keep her out of harm's way, she is doing the same." Padfoot didn't say anything, and Wormtail simply took another bite of his pancake.

oooo

James walked back to the common room alone, having shown the first year student the way to the washroom. He tried to avert his attention elsewhere, but it seemed to be glued to his thoughts, his predicament, unrelenting its hold. He had told Lily. Not all of it, mind you, but some of it, and after he had, a part of the lead weight lifted from his stomach. If only he had told her the rest.

He would, he concluded, for he now saw her as an equal. She was no longer a challenge, no longer a pretty witch with breath-taking charisma, someone unattainable, she was simply Lily Evans, the witch he had lusted after, the witch he now considered as his.

Well, not romantically so in any way, shape or form. That had been established long ago, he affirmed to himself. No, Lily Evans was now more of a…an accomplice? A partner? A friend? Perhaps she'd be a friend. He didn't know quite yet. He figured he'd have to ask first. The thought brought him back several years prior, when he had asked, literally, if Sirius would like to be friends with him. He smiled at that.

All he knew at that moment was that Lily was his responsibility. If Lily were to ever get hurt, James would be the one to blame. And James Potter, although a spoiled child who was practically showered with everything he ever wanted, protection and attention included, was sort of over protective himself. He took his role very seriously, all you had to do was ask Sirius or Remus or Peter how he got. Once you were under James' radar of one whom he had to tend to, you never got hurt, and if you did, you quickly forgot your pain.

He would give Lily no opportunity to feel pain.

* * *

So this is chapter 4. I am sort of trying to come up with something for On vient de loin, the continuation of S'sB, as that story is a bit more...I dunno, real to me or something - whatever it is, it hits closer to home than this one (which I started writing a loooong time ago). In any case, I'm not sure whether or not I should even bother with H'sR, since the response is quite minimal...

Anyway, to my two lovely reviewers, I love you! This chapter is definitely for you.


	5. Chapter 5

And here's #5! Although it may not be as good as the other chapters. I had to stuff in a lot in this chapter, which is why everything is choppy. Oh well, perhaps some day I'll edit this really meticulously and rewrite it all!

Enjoy! (&Please Review!)

* * *

Chapter 5

Halloween was celebrated throughout the school and everyone was at the feast, except for three people, who had managed to slip out unnoticed, and were now standing in the dungeons, wand at the ready, attempting to fight non-verbally, all the while, conjuring a patronus.

"Remember, Miss Evans, pure focus and happy thoughts!" Lily nodded. "Mr Pottter?"

James' eyes went from ground to Dumbledore's eyes. "Yes, Professor."

"Attack Lily. Now" James didn't bother objecting this time, he always lost his case. He thought of the invisible ropes and figured it would be the least painful thing to do. Instead, he ended up attempting to stupefy her.

His attempts were blocked, and Lily managed to throw him a tripping curse, which he effectively blocked as well. Dumbledore, James was sure, was throwing little spells here and there, and James felt himself hit with one. His eyes went crossed. He couldn't see anymore.

He knew what it was, and he knew the counter curse, but he was trying to block Lily's body binding curse. It must have looked weird for anyone stepping in or through the room, as the only sounds heard were those of heavy breathing, a few steps back or forward, and light blowing off the top of their wands. They looked like they were in a full blown out battle, yet there was no screaming, no threatening, just hexing.

Quickly, James muttered the counter curse to his cross eyed vision, at the expense of being thrown against the wall. The wind was knocked out of him, his eyes began tearing while hishands shook slightly. He raised his wand at Lily, then as he was saying his curse in his head, flipped his wand and aimed it at Dumbledore instead, who was taken off guard and slipped to the ground, incarcerated by invisible ropes. He then switched his glare on to Lily, still struggling to regain his breath, and muttered the curse that left her wandless. He held both his and her wand now, and pointed one at both of his opponents.

Dumbledore's eyes proved hewas impressed. "Good, Mr Potter, excellent!" He untied himself from the binds and approached the now breathless James.

"James?" Lily called out worriedly. His face had taken on a shade of red she had never seen on a human face. It rivalled the crimson of her hair.

James nodded quickly. "I'm okay," he croaked, trying to hold on to his breath. "Just…can't…breathe."

Dumbledore's brow creased his forehead. "Sit down," a pillow appeared, "and take a break. Hand Miss Evans back her wand." James did as he was told. "Now, Miss Evans, I want to see your patronus this time."

James watched silently as Lily was hit with all sorts of jinxes and spells. James cursed under his (very short) breath. Lily's face looked set, her eyes ablaze, but her stance…betrayed her offensive and defensive gestures. After a few moments, Lily was sitting down next to James, struggling to catch her own breath.

"Lily," James turned to face her, yet she kept her green eyes focused on her hands. "You're good at charms, right?" Lily nodded solemnly. "Charm things. Use that to your advantage." Lily looked at James as though seeing him for the first time tonight. She nodded, stood and stared at their Headmaster, who, as old as he was, didn't look very much affected by the action. His breathing was even, and he stared at them over the top of his half-moon spectacles, expecting, always expecting.

Lily tightened her grip on her wand, pointed it at Dumbledore, and a stream of red light headed his way. Dumbledore didn't even try to duck, and the spell completely missed him, hitting the statue behind him, whose mask flew off and landed on top of Dumbledore's head.

"Clever," he mumbled to himself, but even as he did so, he prepared to aim a curse at Lily. James leapt in front of her, obviously screaming PROTEGO in his head. The spell bounced off him, and Lily, taking advantage of the small amount of time James had given her, shot a curse that hit Dumbledore directly on the chest, followed immediately by a large white leopard. His face remained expressionless behind the mask, although he started giggling incessantly.

James proceeded to disarm him, succeeded, and both he and Lily walked up to Dumbledore menacingly. It had been the first time they had overtaken him. The first day of practice they had realised that Dumbledore's reflexes outdid anyone's. He was quick, alert, and always three steps ahead of everyone. Lily and James had secretly sworn to one day become as good as Dumbledore, if not better.

"Give up, Dumbledore?" James said with a lopsided grin and a twitch of his eyebrows.

Dumbledore kept laughing, giggling at the invisible feather tickling his toes.

"I'll take that as a yes, wouldn't you, James?" He nodded his agreement. Together they bound him with those invisible ropes (one of James' favourites by now) and Lily took off the laughing charm. Dumbledore regarded them with pride.

Lily let down her wand and jumped into James' arms. "HAHA! We did it! Finally!" James grinned absentmindedly. "Yeah," he said quietly, "we beat Dumbledore."

"A feat," the old wizard said, "not many have the opportunity to brag about." He untied himself after James handed back his wand. "This is cause for a celebration – come, let us drink." With a wave of his wand, a bottle of the finest mead appeared with three glasses. Lily and James summoned a few chairs, both of them bursting with pride.

After a few odd silent moments, and a few overly loud moments (where James and Lily discussed what techniques they had employed, what charms and counter curses they had used) Dumbledore, who had long ago not only drained his glass but also refilled it and drained it once more, cleared his throat. "I believe it is time to entrust you with assignments now. You two must keep training, but I have other matters to attend to. Christmas is fast approaching, and that means the perfect time for a Death Eater attack." James and Lily looked serious, although James' face showed more concern and worry than anything.

"Come see me in my office three days before Christmas holidays," Dumbledore continued as he stood, towering over the sitting James and Lily, "and I will give you your assignments. Now, if you'll both excuse me, this old wizard needs the comfort of his other pupils, who are presently awaiting me to dismiss them from the feast." James and Lily nodded their heads, thanked their Headmaster, and watched him disappear from the classroom.

"Thank you for the tip, James," Lily said casually. "I never thought to use charms. I always figured hexing and jinxing would be more efficient."

James shrugged. "I remembered him saying something about everyone excelling in their own rights. I know that you always kick my butt in Potions, but since that'll be useless for now, I thought of where you almost beat me - charms!So, I figured you should use what you are almost best at." He winked at her, she rolled her eyes in response.

"And what are you best at, Mr Potter?" she asked teasingly, although she had meant to ask it in earnest.

"Transfigurations, I guess, I am pretty good at DADA too, though, but not that good." Lily nodded. James was top in Transfigurations, Remus was top in Defence Against the Dark Arts. Sirius, for some reason or another, excelled at Charms, although Remus, James and Sirius were always in the top 5 of every class.

"Then why don't you use that for your offence?" James seemed to be reflecting on that.

"I'll try next time," he managed before taking another sip of his mead.

oooo

The weeks between Halloween and Christmas went by faster than ever, the N.E.W.Ts classes becoming more and more time consuming. James half returned to normal, minus his arrogance, for he had again led his team to not so glorious victories against Slytherin and Hufflepuff. Secretly, though, his good mood was more or less brought on by his and Lily's overtaking of Dumbledore – the most powerful wizard alive. Of course, they both knew Dumbledore could have easily beaten them both, yet, something about having caught him off guard was, to them, a feat to be proud of.

James resumed his usual pranks with his Marauders, enchanting some of the Christmas decorations to either chase around Slytherins or some Professors. But the school, despite rumours of the war raging on the outside of the castle walls, kept in good cheer and not even the teachers looked bothered by James and company's resuming to their usual annoying selves.

Sirius, of course, had followed James around ever since he'd noticed James had left during the Halloween feast, without being annoying. Of course, he also spotted Lily was not at the table and thus assumed that Halloween had been something a bit more romantic for James, although he denied it through and through.

The two full moons had been spent inside the school, using the Marauder's map to guide them to the kitchens, steal fresh meat and bring it back to a salivating werewolf and black dog. Prongs preferred berries and fruits, but enjoyed candies most of all.

Perhaps the most curious happenstance of all was the hint of a friendship between Lily and James. To everyone in Gryffindor, these people had been the cause of much grief over the past two years or so, and so to them, it was odd that the usual never-ending arguments now only manifested themselves in short lived snaps or, sometimes, if someone was really attentive, they might even detect a lingering look on both parts.

Three days before winter vacation, Lily Evans and James Potter were spotted, for the first time in a while, without their friends, walking towards the Headmaster's office. Lily spoke first.

"So how did you manage to get Head Boy, then James? I would have thought Remus – "

James shrugged. "Something happened last term, let's just say, and since then, Dumbledore has placed much trust in me." She wrinkled her nose at the poor excuse. "Something about Sniv…Snape, and bringing him out of harm's way."

"You mean Remus." James stumbled. "Oh please, I figured it out, don't look so surprised! I'm not thick, you know!" James started to explain that he didn't think she was, but the Headmaster had come out of his office to meet them.

"Ah, Miss Evans, Mr Potter, excellent timing. Come now, up we go." Dumbledore whispered the password to his office and they stood on the spinning steps together, waiting for the headmaster to offer them a seat in his office.

James found himself seated in the same spot he had that fateful Friday morning. Dumbledore was eyeing one of his many shiny objects, mysteries perhaps to all except Dumbledore himself. With an occasional nod, an even less frequent "mmhmmm" Dumbledore peered inside one of them until satisfied with something, then turned to the two students, the Head Girl and Head Boy of this year.

"James, I offer you a choice. I have –" But James didn't need Dumbledore to finish before he knew what had happened.

"My mother?" he asked, swallowing back his anguish. He remembered Lily was sitting beside him, but didn't make to cut off the headmaster any more.

Dumbledore frowned, mostly to himself, and opened his mouth to say something, a tear escaping his eye instead. "She was a lovely, loving, bright witch, James." James nodded. Lily sat feeling extremely uncomfortable, listening and looking at James' reaction as he found out about his mother's death. "The Order did everything in their power to help her,unfortunately, she..." Dumbledore tried to comfort James, but James was in shock and barely reacted to Dumbledore's words.

The headmaster, eyes still damp, turned to face Lily. "Your parents, Miss Evans, have been made aware of your plans to join the Order. I am deeply regretful that you did not have a chance to address them on your own, but some of my colleagues..." Lily tried to say something, but instead found herself speechless.She wondered whethershe had made the right decision, whether her decision wouldeventually result in the death ofher mother or father. James' mother's death, although she knew had been planned previous to James' accepting a place in the Order, was an all too real reminder of just what they had taken on.

The white haired, white bearded wizard gave them time, if somewhat restricted, to remember the purpose of their meeting. To his surprise, James was the first to remind them. "About our assignment," he said with more determination, more control in his voice James had ever had. Dumbledore was taken by surprise. James Potter, it seemed, was full of surprises.

"You two will accompany a few other members, who are looking after the trial of the certain two Death Eaters who attacked James at the end of September. You will be asked to testify, and then you will both be taken to our Headquarters, where more assignments await you once you've graduated from Hogwarts." James looked eager to get started.

Once outside the Headmaster's office, it was Lily who broke down. "James," she sobbed quietly, "I am so sorry, so so sorry about your mother," she wiped tear after tear escaping her eyes. James rubbed her shoulders comfortingly, hushing her, telling her that she shouldn't be crying. "But **you** should be, Potter! It's **your** mother who's died, not mine!" James released her at that moment, and continued walking ahead, although at a slower pace than he habitually took.

"I won't cry, Lily. Not now, not in front of you." She straightened her back in attempts to regain her pride, although her eyes were still red and puffy. He looked over at her and sighed. "So," he commenced too light-heartedly, "what are your plans for Christmas." At the mention of Christmas, Lily's bottom lip started twitching, suppressing another sob.

"We usually," she struggled to keep her composure, "spend quiet holidays. We unwrap gifts and listen to Christmas songs on the radio."

"That sounds lovely," James sighed, remembering that this Christmas would be different for his family.

"What are you going to do James?" She flinched as she asked the question.

"I'm going to take care of my mother's funeral. My father won't be home, of course, I'm sure he won't sleep until he catches whoever … whoeverkilled my mother. That means Sirius and I will be left alone." His eyes sprang wide, grabbed Lily by the shoulders and started shaking her (not too hard though, he didn't want to hurt her!). "Bloody Hell! Padfoot's gonna tail me all winter long! He'll be the most difficult thing to shake off to go to the trial!" Lily's face turned pale as reason flooded her brain.

"You have to shake him off!" They had meant to keep the order a secret from everyone, and they had succeeded, but Sirius was being relentless in his inquiries about where James and Lily would run off to every Saturday mornings. James appreciated Sirius' concerns, and, although never deliberately, he sometimes found himself dropping hints about there being other more important duties than Head Boy duties.

ooooo

"I'll drop by your house as soon as I head off to the trial." Lily nodded at James, pink cheeks from the cold, bits of white snowflakes lingering at the top of her toque and hair.

"Take care of yourself, James Potter," she said, shivering slightly.

"Happy Christmas to you, Lily Evans." With a quick smile (which still held traces of sadness), Prongs turned and joined up with his brother-who-wasn't, heading towards Mr Potter. The train ride had been grim, Sirius being every bit as affected as James was about Mrs Potter's death. The Marauders had sat alone in a compartment near the back of the train, and had barely uttered a word throughout the entire trip.

"I won't be home often this Christmas, boys," greeted Mr Potter as he,Sirius and James apparated at the Potters' front door. Prongs and Padfoot nodded. They had known. "Take care of James for me, will 'ya Sirius?"

"I will Mr Potter," Sirius replied tonelessly.

"James, take care of your handsome brother," James grunted a response, not quite ready yet for humour, no matter how touchingly sweet it was. "The food's a plenty, the gifts as well. Don't stay up too late. I'll be back soon…" they were empty words, James recognized a hopeless farewell when he heard one.

Sirius clasped hands with James' dad, wished him happy holidays, and stepped inside, closing the door so as to let James and his father talk things over. James' father broke down first.

"I could pretend, for you James, I could act as though I'm not affected, but I can't. Your mother – I love her with all my heart – and I couldn't save her."

"It's not your fault, dad – "

"Nor is it yours, James. Your headmaster's told me how you've taken her death. It's not your fault, James, and don't go out seeking revenge. Don't do it, James, stay safe, behind the lines. We could hide you, ship you off somewhere, I swear the Death Eaters won't find you."

James regarded his father with a blank expression. "I refuse the offer to be a coward, father. But thank you for the option."

His eyes were menacing. "James, don't risk your life. Your mother died peacefully thinking you were safe at Hogwarts. Don't join Dumbledore's – "

It was then that James realised the purpose of his life. As corny as it sounds, James' neurosynapses connected in a way that let him understand exactly what he wanted to do. "Dad, I'm fit to do this. I'm made to be doing this. What better incentive could I have? My entire family has a mark on their heads – except for Sirius, who's mark is actually more from his mother than anything else – and I have only one member left to protect!" James released an exasperated sigh. To his mind, his parents had done their role. Now they had aged, weakened, and were his responsibility. It was just the way things went – you raised your child to the best of your abilities, and when you could no longer care for yourself, then your child would care for you. He felt a pang of guilt as he realised that he hadn't been able to protect his mother. _No,_ he told himself, _it was NOT your fault._ Lily had repeated this time and again and, since it came from Lily, James accepted it.

"I won't be the cause of family shame. I know I'm going to die, dad, just as I knew mom was, and I know you are. It's inevitable! I've come to terms with it, and I know you have now Mum's gone, but I won't die without bringing a few of 'em down first. I'm going to make a difference – no matter how small it is – before I meet my end." James' eyes now matched the colour of his rosy cheeks. He was crying, for the first time since he'd heard of his mother's death, but the young man was not entirely sure it was his mother that he was mourning.

Mr Potter observed his son quietly, taking him in, accepting him as a man for the first time. He rested his hand upon James' shoulder – which was slightly higher than his own – and sighed. "You are a much better man than I, James. A much more talented wizard and a much braver man." James nodded appreciatively. "I'd give anything to trade places with your mother so she could hear you say all this." A tear sparkled at the bottom of his eyelid. "Now give your father a hug before he goes on this mission to not get himself killed." James embraced his father for the second time in seven years. Both men let go of what had been bottling up inside, and both accepted the other's comfort. They stayed out on the front steps for many a minutes before James headed back inside.


End file.
